When every room is dark and all I can hear is a low electrical humming of a computer, I feel it a comfortable time to write. While I sit and batteries recharge before I completely turn myself off, I think of you, Charlie. I finally opened the envelope. It took me days to pick it up for it looked quite at its place, there on the corner of my desk. If you had warned me of what you asked in your letter, I may have left it there a few weeks. I admit that if you had clued me in as to what you sealed in that envelope, I would have prepared myself.
Today was one of those days that you would have loved to feel. There were a few clouds between the leaves and the sun and a few cold winds passing through between the houses. I wore my heavy coat and two pairs of socks to stay warm. No need for more. There are so little days like this left before December. Then it will suddenly be the end of December, the time when everything changes, or the chosen time to make the changes. But waking up is a drag. The darker it gets, the heavier the air becomes.
I went to see a movie tonight. Again, a friend saved me from locking myself in. Is there anything better than seeing a movie in a theater? Sitting with friends, in the dark, staring at some light? Yes, ha, there is something better... I enjoyed the movie very much. Actually, we could all agree on that, the movie was good. There is always a smile on someone’s face when the destination becomes a speed bump.
I don’t know what else to tell you. I know that what you want from life is beautiful. I know that what you see in it can be ashen and that while you stand in the fire that you have made for yourself, as I make my own, you will reach out to the very nature that helps you burn. Will it save you? I can’t say. There will always be a few clouds, a few winds, a few suns, a few me, a few you. It’s what we keep remembering every year. I also know that this is probably not what you expected of me. If you knew what I know and knew what step I would take next, would you still be here? Would you still operate the same way you have been?
Today was one of those days that you would have loved to feel. There were a few clouds between the leaves and the sun and a few cold winds passing through between the houses. I wore my heavy coat and two pairs of socks to stay warm. No need for more. There are so little days like this left before December. Then it will suddenly be the end of December, the time when everything changes, or the chosen time to make the changes. But waking up is a drag. The darker it gets, the heavier the air becomes.
I went to see a movie tonight. Again, a friend saved me from locking myself in. Is there anything better than seeing a movie in a theater? Sitting with friends, in the dark, staring at some light? Yes, ha, there is something better... I enjoyed the movie very much. Actually, we could all agree on that, the movie was good. There is always a smile on someone’s face when the destination becomes a speed bump.
I don’t know what else to tell you. I know that what you want from life is beautiful. I know that what you see in it can be ashen and that while you stand in the fire that you have made for yourself, as I make my own, you will reach out to the very nature that helps you burn. Will it save you? I can’t say. There will always be a few clouds, a few winds, a few suns, a few me, a few you. It’s what we keep remembering every year. I also know that this is probably not what you expected of me. If you knew what I know and knew what step I would take next, would you still be here? Would you still operate the same way you have been?
Labels: artform, Dear Charlie, film
<< Home